The Past
Three summers ago, I had pain in my abdomen, just below the
ribs on the right side. Tests indicated
that my gallbladder was non-functional.
No stones were found, it was just sitting there not doing anything in
particular. So, I had it removed,
I recovered, and still had pain, but simply attributed it to irritable bowel
syndrome or something.
Two summers ago I spent in what felt like total
darkness. Starting in April, I saw a
neurologist who said that my horrific headaches were likely from intracranial
pressure. A spinal-tap later, I was in misery. I tried pain medicine, migraine medicine that
made me very sick, and very stupid. I
got lost on ‘back of the hand blindfolded’ roads. I called people by the wrong name. I took one medicine which made me very sick;
the warning label should have stated something like: ‘may cause what feels like a massive heart
attack.’ I wore sunglasses indoors and
earned the nickname ‘hollywood’ at work.
Finally around November of that year, I went to see a pain
specialist, and she suggested cervical branch block. It’s a fancy term for burning all the
irritated nerves in the neck. For three months I went through the regimen
of short acting test injections, then long acting, and finally the permanent burning of
the nerves, one side at a time. Totaling
24 injections in all. I now only get
headaches when I make my monthly turn of the ‘wheel of fortune’. Such a relief!
That following spring, I got all healed from my headaches,
and my back went out. I missed a week of
work. MRI scans showed degenerative disk
disease in my lowest vertebrae.
Treatment? Lose weight. I was then at 275 pounds. Much of the weight I gained stemmed from
being completely sedentary the year before.
I recovered from my back pain eventually, and last summer, decided to
take back my life from the clutches of despair.
So I got last summer off from health problems. Praise God for a great gift!
At the end of the summer, I saw a plastic surgeon to discuss
my huge (insert whatever synonym you like for breasts here). I started one of the most rewarding journeys
of my life. I started walking, even did
a 5 mile hike! I began losing
weight. On November 9th,
after some preparation, I had a breast reduction. I went from a 44G to a 42D. They removed 6.5 pounds of breast tissue. I
have never felt as good in my adult life.
Such a relief. I continued
walking and exercising, and my eating habits were steadily improving. Since my back went out at 275, I have lost 33
pounds, putting me at 242, and still dropping.
The Present
Now it is summer again.
I still have pain in about the same place in my abdomen just under my
right ribs as I had before I had my gallbladder removed, but it is livable,
and I enjoy my time feeling better and getting healthier.
But, as they say, good things are appreciated
more when they are interspersed with some adversity.
Over the last few months, I have had some bouts of severe
pain in that same area. I have lots of
pressure in my abdomen. If I lay on my
stomach, or while playing with my son (hands and knees), I get a surprise
attack of some pretty severe pain. It passes,
but it is miserable. Also, I have to
play contortionist to get in a successful position to do bathroom business of
either kind. Also, I feel like I'm in there every 5 minutes. I feel full after only a
bite of food. My stomach growls all the
time, and I have gnawing pain in my gut, like I’m constantly hungry, even
though I haven’t much of an appetite. And Oh! The Belching! The
periodic womanly symptoms are increasing in intensity.
I figured I might have an ulcer, which would have explained
the pain in my belly. Last week I had an
upper endoscopy, where I had to swallow a camera so the doctor could look
around. He said that he didn’t see
anything in my GI tract that would be causing my pain, and he wanted me to have
a CT scan the next morning. After the testing,
and a painful sleepless weekend, I received my results. My appointment was yesterday. The doctor walks into the room and looks at
me in that tone of voice you know means they found something, and that whatever it is-is not good.
“You have a mass way down deep in
your abdomen, in your reproductive area, and it is about the size of a
baseball. 4.5 inches across. We don’t
know what it is for sure, only that it is there. I want you to see a Gynecologic Oncologist in
Mountain Home that can talk about cancer testing, and if you are done having
kids, more than likely a total hysterectomy.
Your appointment is at 9:30 Monday morning.”
The Future
I don’t know what the future holds, exactly. I do know that I most likely have major
surgery in my future. I will keep
everyone posted as I find out what comes next.
A friend reminded me to take one problem at a time, and not let myself
get overwhelmed with the ‘what if’s’…
So, I put it to you:
Please say some prayers for me. I
can use all the strength, good thoughts, and healing energy that I can absorb.
Bless you all for being my friends. I am grateful for each of you.
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